How Did I Get Here?

Quote of the Day: “I used to have a handle on life, then it broke.”

This morning, our guests left and since their plane left at 0745 (which felt like 0645 because of the time change and subtract 3 hours because they were from the West Coast so it felt like 0345 to them) I decided that they were Carrie’s friends so Carrie should have this last special time with them on the way to the airport. I would stay home and make sure the kids stayed fast asleep in their bed.

So at some point, I became aware that Carrie was hopping BACK into bed…

And at another point I decided I should get up and get my run started. I had already lost an hour due to Springing forward.

Last week it occurred to me that I should probably get back into the long running on the weekend since I have another marathon coming up in May. My normal work-up routine builds up the mileage, peaks, and then starts to taper before the race. But this year, I ran the Shamrock which threw everything off. I had to go through the work-up routine based on that race but at the other side, I was left out of synch for the work-up schedule of the May race.

So last week I decided, screw it, I’ll just jump right back into the routine where I’d normally be. I opened my handy dandy spreadsheet (yes, I keep a spreadsheet and create a tab for every race) and worked out the schedule, working backwards from race day.

What was I on tap for this FIRST weekend back after the Shamrock?

20 miles.

Shit.

Then there was a 12 next weekend before coming to the big Grand Puba of training runs: the last Big One before the race. I did 36 for the Shamrock. More on that later.

It COULDN’T have been a 12-miler or anything. No, I had to jump right back into a 20 miler. Oh well, I’ve been doing 1.5 hours of cardio per day so maybe things will work out.

When I got out to TBS, I remembered my friend’s admonishment about going around locked gates so I took a drive out to the 1.5 mile point only to find that the gate was indeed locked.

Shit, again.

So I took a right, went past Lunga Lake, past the FBI Academy, past the rifle range, and found that the fire station marked exactly 5 miles.

OK, out there and back was 10 and a repeat performance was my 20 miler. No problem.

To tell you the truth, it wasn’t. The cardio had really done its job and the only thing I really had to contend with was the heat coming out toward the middle of the day and a few bugs. I really liked that it was 5-mile legs which broke up the run in manageable pieces and at the halfway mark, I was at my car so I could restock supplies (water, Gu).

When I got to the start line, I took a walk to the common bathroom in the barracks but the plumbing was once again problematic which didn’t seem to bother some people since they filled the bowl with shit and toilet paper anyway. Both the male and female bathrooms.

The problem was, I had to go and not just maybe. I decided to drive over to the gym and take advantage of those facilities but when I got there, I noticed that it was shut down for renovations.

Lovely.

Then I noticed there was some construction nearby with two port-a-johns. The first one I walked up to was locked and my heart sank. I couldn’t even START the run in my condition and anyway, the entire route was in “civilization” so I would have to trek a ways to get any bear-like privacy, if you know what I mean.

Luckily, the other port-a-john was open and I was able to … I was set.

The first two legs, I made it under 50 minutes each. The last two, just over that time so I only dropped a couple minutes off a 10-minute pace. Not bad for not having run long since the marathon.

I was so proud of myself and although I had kind of pigged out this weekend with my guests, I reveled in the thought of how many calories I burned running 20 miles in 3 and a half hours. I could almost feel my waist shrinking.

Ringgg.
“Hi, Honey, I’m done and on my way home.”
“How was it?”
“Great but I’m glad it’s over.”
“OK, well I got Taco Bell for you so it’ll be ready for you when you get home.”

Suddenly my stomach pooched out to normal.

Damn.

Free Advice for Today: “When you mean no, say it in a way that’s not ambiguous.”