How Did I Get Here?

Wednesday

Towards the end of the day today, I learned that there was a Volunteer Appreciation Dinner that MCCS was putting on and the CO asked if I wanted to attend.

When a CO asks, that’s pretty much saying “Um, you’re going.”

It ends up that it was mainly for the Key Volunteers which are the spouses of the Marines. Our network of spouses is about as strong as a wet noodle but the Colonel wanted representation so I called Carrie and asked her to come. She was working a case for the part-time job she sometimes works and was going to be a little late.

So I hung out with the CO and his wife as we watched the endless parade of presentations to just about everyone present. It was a Volunteer Appreciation event and by God, every volunteer was going to be recognized. Individually. Until clapping made your hands feel like they were washed in acid.

When it came time for my unit, the CO invited me up to help hand out the certificates. All other units had the CO and the Sergeant Major so I was pulled up there as the second man since the Sergeant Major wasn’t around.

So I felt pretty dumb just standing there clapping, shaking hands, and appreciatin’ like a champ.

There was some entertainment though. Pam, …

… who you might remember from my Jane Wayne Day post works for MCCS and the theme for the dinner was the 50s. Someone thought it would be cute if Pam and another gal dressed up in poodle/waitress skirts and made milkshakes for everyone.

Just a note: if you reserve a poodle/waitress skirt costume from a costume shop, don’t do it sight unseen.

You see, the skirt was… um.. well, it was kind of an idealized version of a poodle skirt with a guy’s ideal in mind. Poodle skirts are normally pretty long and a waitress, if she wears a skirt, is not mid-thigh.

Needless to say, Pam, who is by nature a rather conservative dresser, was not all that comfortable wearing kind of a sexy costume get-up to this event but she could do nothing about it.

She served a lot of milkshakes.

They ran out of supplies.

I, of course, didn’t miss any opportunity to tease her about this.

Another funny moment was when I looked across the room and saw SSGT Tallman. You will also remember him from the Jane Wayne day post as the DI who was saddled assigned to our platoon.

But today he was not Drill Instructor Tallman but rather just regular Marine husband forced to go to an event. He had civilian attire on which included an untucked dress shirt and jeans. He looked …well, he looked fine for an average Marine his age but it was weird BECAUSE he looked fine for an average Marine his age in regular old clothes. It’s amazing how the starched and pressed uniform of a Marine Corps Drill Instructor can make a young man look timeless. In uniform, he could be from just about any era.

Carrie showed up and I had waited for her before I ate. We got what was left over and was just happy to be sharing a meal with my lovely wife. If anyone needed appreciation, it was her. She divides her time between taking care of the kids, me, the house, the dumb dog, and somehow finds time to work a side job and volunteers as a Key Volunteer as well as a case worker for the Semper Fi fund for wounded Marines.

As though I had not harassed poor Pam enough, I had to get one more shot in. At the end of the event, people were starting to fade away fast because as these things happen, if you are linger too long, they will tag you to help tear everything down.

So when I saw Pam stealthily heading for the door, I announced loudly from acrossthe big room “Hey Pam, takin’ off?”

She darted a look at me that could melt diamonds.

I laughed.

I slay me.

Free Advice for Today: “Always watch the high school bands’ halftime performances. They practiced just as hard as the football players.”