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Love Ya, Sarah, but….

Friday, March 19th, 2010

Quote of the Day: “If you want to know what God thinks of money, just look at the people he gave it to.”

- Dorothy Parker

What a predicament I have found myself in.

You all must know by now that I have an unhealthy obsession with Sarah McLachlan. It’s not secret, although it should be. I am not well.

Just forget that for now … I just found out that not only is Sarah putting out a new CD in June, if I preorder it through her website, I get early dibs on getting tickets to an upcoming event.

And here’s where it becomes a predicament.

Sarah, you know how I feel. Everyone knows. But as much as I have enjoyed three of your live concerts, I must take inventory of the last shreds of manliness and sort out how I can justify going to, dare I utter it ………. Lilith Fair.

I mean, it looks good on paper. You got two of my favorite artists of all time: Sarah (of course) …

and Sheryl Crow …

Then you have this Colbie Caillat who I mistake for Jennifer Aniston every time I see her …

There will be Erykah Badu …

and Sugarland …

… there too so what’s my problem with all of this?

Well, let’s start with the fact that it is not a Sarah McLachlan concert. She is sharing the stage with 11 other artists, most of which I have never even heard of. So she will only be singing a sampling of her genius and likely do a watered down medley that is sure to disappoint.

Same with Ms. Crow. I would want to see all her songs in full, not just a few. Inevitably, I’d leave thinking “I can’t believe she didn’t sing XXX”

Then you have the other three I mentioned above and although I’ve heard of them, I probably, maybe know ONE of their songs. Not exactly worth going all the way to…

… the second complication…

The Gorge. I have never been there and I hear it is a wonderful venue but I also heard it is a haul to get out there and back. My brother claims to have spent many a drunk fest out there and by morning, it’s a messy painfest punctuated by a long drive home. I do believe I am too old for that kind of thing and no, I am not ashamed to admit that.

A couple of other minor details in the “con” column:

- I don’t have a lot of disposable income these days due to the whole unemployed thing
- I have a penis so my presence at the fair might cause a lesbian riot

So as much as I can’t believe that I’m going to say this but while I will obviously look forward to buying Sarah’s new tracks from her site (gotta support her lest she decides to scramble back to Canada and stop making music) but I will have to take a pass as the early or, for that matter, late ticket opportunities to see her at Lilith Fair.

What kind of rabid fanatic am I anyway? Obviously one with limits.

But let her come anywhere around here in the Great Northwest and see how fast I crack open the piggy bank to get the best seats available. Hopefully, she will not call me out for not going to the fair.

Free Advice for Today: “Share the credit.”

- H. Jackson Brown, Jr.